Three Envelopes

This is a management story that applies to any level, any organization. Basically, it is a story of incompetent management, for when one observes these indications, the manager knows not what he is doing. I originally heard it as an Army story, so shall relay it in that form; but it is truly universal.

A new, young Army Captain was assuming command of a company from a retiring, experienced, "Mustang" Captain. After the usual round of takeover tasks, the two of them were relaxing in the Company Commander's office. The retiring captain told the new commander, "I have left you three numbered, sealed envelopes in your desk drawer. If things seem not to be going well, open the envelopes in sequence and apply the principle stated. Good luck." The retiring captain left and the new captain took his place behind the desk and smiled at the nice gesture of the outgoing commander.

After approximately a month, things were indeed not going well, so the Captain decided to try the envelopes, thinking, they couldn't hurt and just might help. So, he opened the desk, retrieved the first envelope and ripped it open. It read, "Blame it on your predecessor."

Well, since he was gone, why not? Things did indeed seem to go better for a couple of months, but the tact was getting old and began getting only pained, impatient looks. He decided to try the next envelops, so opened the desk, retrieved number two, and opened it. It read, "Reorganize."

Sure enough, that one really worked--for awhile. Then, things really weren't going much better, and no one wanted to hear that word, again. Thinking this last envelope had better be good, he retrieved and opened it. It read, "Get three envelopes!"

Want to bet on four?

Thirty years ago, tonight, the American public shocked the pollsters, the political pundits, and the Eastern media mouths, by a landslide election of a b-grade movie actor considered an amiable lightweight. By the time of that actor's death, his legend had reached near Churchillian proportion.

The main lesson repeated that night was the public periodically refuses to live down to political opinion that they are stupid. They throw the rascals out. They've done this about once per decade, but have now done it every two years three times in a row. Want to bet on four?